Early this morning (2am Christmas Day), as I spread peanut butter on the 68^th sandwich (out of 100 to be given to the ‘needy’), I was asking my self ‘will it be worth it’.

When I finished wrapping my last present (3:30am), and was rearranging the gifts under the tree (strategically) to give Lauren and Jack the illusion of having a thousand presents, I was asking myself if they would even care.

As I scraped the ice off my windshield (6:35am) to drive my lunches to the homeless shelter, and sped through the streets of Springfield, to deliver the lunches before the folks were required to leave the shelter at 7am, I wondered if I was even making a difference…

Over the past several months, I’ve questioned whether or not, with me building this website, and displaying my ‘heart’ and past failures to the world, if I would ever make a difference.

As I share with all of you, the many good deeds I do, I question whether or not I should tell anyone: Matthew 6:1-2 (Jesus said) “Be careful not to do your ‘acts of righteousness’ before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by men…”

The reason this is on my heart and mind, and the reason this can get confusing is this… Matthew 5:14-16 (Jesus said) “You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.

You can see how this is clear as ‘mud’. However, I have read many verses that God judges the heart, and that in the end, God and God alone. God is The One I should worry about, so… but as you can see, it is God that has said the two verses above, so…??? And since I fear God and God alone, my mind will not rest until I get a clear understanding!

Did I tell you that I have OCD (Obsession Compulsive Disorder)? I analyze, re-analyze, then over-analyze. My mind debates, and debates, and debates until I find a clear answer. I have analyzed these two verses to the point of placing myself back in chains.

That was until God walked me through these verses (revelation), this Christmas morning, as I was putting these lunches together. Now I can rest. I have truly received the perfect CHRISTMAS PRESENT INDEED - Freedom again through Jesus Christ!

Let me walk you through the same process that I went through:

1. Regardless of what others think of me (including myself), the homeless that I give the lunches to will receive a blessing by the giving of the food.
2. God wants us as Christians to care about the ‘least of these’, and wants us to care by giving.
3. 14 years ago, I spent an entire Christmas day, lying on the floor, looking at the ceiling, because I ate a ‘pot’ brownie, followed by smoking a blunt.
4. This year, I spent (thus far) Christmas day with Jesus.
5. I used to spend every waking moment wanting to get high.
6. Today, I spend every waking moment wanting to get high (on God).
7. Last year, I was OCD with worry, depression, guilt, fear…
8. Today, I am OCD for God (happy, joyful, at peace, not scared of anything but God).
9. Just last year, I spent Christmas a slave to drugs, and was a considered by many as a ‘freak’.
10. This year, I spent Christmas free from drugs, considered by many as a Jesus ‘freak’.

I could keep going, but I want to get to my REVELATION from God. As with many other ministries out there, me spilling my ‘guts’ will be worth it, if ONE soul is won for Christ. Folks, more than ONE seed has been planted for Jesus, by me being a Jesus ‘freak’ (and by the Grace of God).

Which brings me to boasting about it. Should I tell you my good deeds? Even if I have a purpose? The following is the REVELATION I received from God:

I need to boast about what I am doing for God, only when appropriate. But it is o.k. to SHOUT FROM THE MOUNTAIN TOPS WHAT GOD HAS DONE FOR ME, all of the time!!!

God has changed me! I no longer want to do anything for myself, I want to do everything for Jesus Christ!!!

God showed me that I could be OCD for Jesus. There is not ONE verse in the Bible that tells me that I can have TOO MUCH COMPULSION FOR JESUS!!!

God showed me time and time again, in the Bible, that people showed their good deeds in front of many (including Jesus).

God has told me that we are in DARK times, and LIGHT is needed.

God has told me to motivate others with my STORY.

God has told me to quit worrying so much, and just LOVE JESUS MORE AND MORE!!!

As I was thinking about my new REVELATION FROM GOD, I thought about Jesus. I think Jesus had the same intension when He came to Earth. I'm sure He told himself, that If He could just save ONE person, it would all be worth it.

God gave me a short poem in my heart, and I want to share it with you. But first, I need to share with you this verse: Psalms 118:05 “In my anguish I cried to the Lord, and He answered me by setting me FREE”.

God's Poem to Me:
 

I wondered if it was all worth it, because I’m not powerful enough to set people free. Then God told me to just share my weaknesses, and leave the rest to Me.

My Only Son has done everything, for anyone to be free! If they will just BELIEVE and TRUST in Him, they will be FREE INDEED!

You can run my boy, I am with you, especially when you are weak. You’re doing good, well done I say, I'm glad you're a JESUS FREAK!!!

Enjoy the Song!

Merry Christmas!

In His Hands,

Love, Glen

P.S. So far, this has been the best CHRISTmas EVER! (8:58am).

P.S.S. Thank you God for your new mercies, Grace, and Jesus’ birthday celebration!

P.S.S.S. If you think Jesus rising from the dead is the biggest miracle, think again, if Jesus wasn’t born…

P.S.S.S.S. To learn more about obsessive fear, and to learn how to be OCD for GOD, please read the inspiration 'OCD for GOD'.
 

Let JESUS SET YOU FREE, FREE INDEED!